Friday, December 7, 2007

Happy St. Ambrose Day!

Yes, today is the feast of St. Ambrose, so a festive one to you all.

Well I broke my mug from the Maryland Renaissance Festival, which sucks because it held the equivalent of 2 cups of tea, so now I get just a cup at a time. Meanwhile just when it looked like I might finish my holiday gift-making, a crochet hook went missing. This sort of setback in the hand-making process may explain why not so many people subscribe to the "better to give than receive" ideal. Besides, there's nothing you can knit that would compare with a Wii, unless the giftee just doesn't go for gaming. So you see, I am fully aware of the fact that by choosing to make gifts I'm mostly just putting myself in a stressful position, which I could easily avoid by trotting over to the Giant, grabbing half a dozen assorted gift cards, and tossing them into cards. But lets be honest. Isn't the ability to complain a bit just part of the ambiance of the holidays? The Grinch and Mr. Scrooge are two of the biggest holiday celebs, and before you give me the old "because they had a change of heart," routine, recall that while "bah, humbug" appears on t-shirts, coffee mugs, and all sorts of other paraphenalia, Scrooge's change-of-heart line "I will keep Christmas in my heart" appears nowhere. Even the far better written (if a bit sappy) "God bless us, everyone" doesn't get nearly the same amount of gear. Why? Because once a year we all deserve the chance to grumble, and Christmas is a great time. At what other season are we expected to gleefully shell out piles of cash on gifts, wrapping, shipping, cards, cookies, and decor, while listening to countless re-makes of the same six or seven songs, and endure the close contact of relatives you rarely visit for good reason, all while maintaining a cheerful, loving attitude?

I'm not anti-Christmas (although I promise I'll be accused of it), in fact I'm pro-Christmas. All the stress and the bright lights at all hours gives everyone the chance for a much-needed meltdown. Nobody cares if you eat an extra cookie, drink a bit too much rum, get teary-eyed at random events of seasonal significance, and all this is immensely freeing. I suggest that as part of the holiday spirit, we all embrace the Scrooges among us. Go on and grumble a bit: you've probably got a reason. And those of you with no inner Grinch: cut us normal folks some slack. We're not heartless just because we don't want to hear "O Holy Night" 8,000 times before January. Because the true Christmas spirit isn't just about wandering around with a Santa hat and grin, whistling "God Rest ye, Merry Gentlemen." Its also about cutting the other guy some slack, even if he is a grouch. He might have just realized that fruitcake has the same density as mahogany wood (thanks, History Channel, for that fact).

Anyway, those gifts aren't knitting themselves, and I haven't seen any elves yet, so back to the old workshop.